“Set it off.” That phrase has been around since at least the mid to late 1990’s. It’s also what rapper Offset, 1/3 of the popular group Migos, seemed to have in mind over the weekend.

The newly 27-year-old rapper now infamously crashed the set of his estranged wife, Cardi B, while she performed at The Rolling Loud Festival this past Saturday. Complete with flowers and signage that spelled “Cardi, Take Me Back”, he apologized for his actions in front of thousands of confused, appreciative, or dismissive fans.

It was a big gesture.
It was seemingly irritating to Cardi.
It was the talk of the Internet.

It shouldn’t be our priority.

While I understand that entertainment blogs make a living off of how celebrities behave, the rest of us watch their decisions and daily lives like truly unscripted reality television. We weigh in on what “she” should do, “he” should try, and “they” should avoid or complete. We are the foremost authorities on these appealing strangers based on how their professions impact our lives.

The truth? Supporting or bypassing their art is likely where it should end.

For the last several weeks, I’ve heard about what pastors should/shouldn’t purchase, why Black women are considered rehabilitation centers for their men, and what women should or shouldn’t allow. We have massive opinions on what everyone else should do, what their subconscious actions mean, and even how they should raise their kids.

All I ask is this: let’s keep that same energy regarding our own lives.
Cardi either rejecting or accepting Offset’s advances won’t fund our bank accounts.
Ariana Grande being there for Pete Davidson through anything he faces won’t affect our friendships.
Mocking Blac Chyna for her upcoming plastic surgery won’t eliminate our need for a fitness or skin care regimen.
Criticizing Gabrielle Union-Wade for kissing her child or even posting multiple photos of her won’t change our need to ensure we’ve shown proper affection to our children.

I get it: the pretty & the popular and the rich & famous can be fascinating!
However, so is your own life. 

What new trip is on your list for 2019?
What content could you put on a new vision board?
What, if any, damaged relationships need to be addressed if not repaired?
How can you put any free time you may have towards volunteerism in your local community, especially during the Holiday season?
How could you show love to your significant other/child in their love language?
What elderly loved one, new parent, or sick friend could use your help running errands?
What if you expanded your concept of self-care to include visiting a therapist after some of the issues you’ve silently suffered through?

Finally, what if you removed the social media apps from your phone until January and just refocused on the life that’s immediately before you?

Everything I said above is a suggestion – no more, no less. I know some of you are saying, “Heather, you’re taking this way too far. I can focus on their lives and do my own thing, too.” Okay, then! Just consider this: how much more can you accomplish with undivided attention? And are you really clear about how many hours you spend reading about other people’s lives instead of focusing on your own? (Hint: you’d be surprised.)

We’re in the final days of 2018. There are many distractions vying for our attention, but let’s keep them from offsetting (see what I did there?) our greatest priorities. 





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