SnapchatfilterInstagramthrowbackhashtagbadgirllonghairdontcarequeenbosschick.

That’s what social media is starting to look like to me lately.

That stream of consciousness/tribute to Outkast’s iconic first album title was brought to you by, well, what feels like about 50% of Instagram or greater.

When the Internet gained popularity back in the late 1990’s, I remember church elders saying, “The World Wide Web is the devil’s playground.” I laughed then, but now I’m wondering how many “angels” are trapped in that web today.

It’s so easy to want to be the swear-­like-­a-­sailor bad girl who can stomp her way into a room without a care. Modern songs revere her while clothing designers consider her a muse. Good guys want to tame and marry this siren. (Best of luck with that!) Other women both loathe and love her. Why? She often gets what she wants because she’s assertive, influential, and powerful. At the end of the day, that’s what more of us want, isn’t it ­- power? It only seems natural that with power comes and money and authority, and many people will chase that combination until their dying breath.

But…let’s just take a breather from all of these images for a moment.

Clear your mind of the quintessential “bad chick” who’s likely strutting across your frontal lobe and answer this for me.

Who benefits from your “badness?”
What changes do you bring to the community? Your city? Or, for my globe travelers, the world?

Again, this is not meant as an insult, but the question bears repeating for some.
Who and what are you “bossing”, anyway?

I ask these questions because, sometimes, there are personas and images we emulate without realizing the weight they all carry. If I took away your “I Slay” t-­shirt and “Boss B*tch” hashtags, who would you be? I know – it’s slang. I get that easily. What I don’t know is if we, as a society, understand how socially schizophrenic we can appear when we adopt all of these different sayings as gospel.

It’s not just catchphrases that have become issues. Many women enjoy purchasing designer handbags, stilettos, or other high-­end items. The products by themselves aren’t problems. They only become problems when we use them as shields, emotional crutches, and tools for validation.

If you’ve always had a certain boldness or particular edge about you, I’m not here to file it down. My goal is to help those who try to slip the boldness on and off for acceptance to just embrace who they are instead.

In the end, that’s far better than being a “boss” – that’s beautifully classic.

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To read more from me about the big bad world of “boss”-ness, check out my new nonfiction e-book on the topic, “Kill The Bad Boss.”

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